We have such a need for validation –
- Like in Facebook
- +1 in Google+
- +K in Klout
Given the choice between a slew of Likes or being heard, which would you choose?
What does being heard really mean?
Being Heard
One of Oprah’s favorite teachings is that we all have a fundamental need to be heard.
- It tells us and others that we matter
- It validates us
When you acknowledge and share that need, your words take on new meaning and depth.
Here’s how.
#1 – Being heard is understanding.
There are several ways we acknowledge what someone wrote.
- Through comments
- Through feedback
- Through sharing
Acknowledgement means we understand that what was written means something to that person.
We don’t have to agree with the person, but we value the writing enough to give back a piece of ourselves.
#2 – Being heard is listening.
Greek philosopher, Epictetus, offered this great line –
“We have two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we speak.”
I like to believe that it also reminds us that listening is a two-way process.
If you listen to your customers, they will listen to you.
So, if you want to be heard, write with your ears and show your customers you are listening.
#3 – Being heard is the highest form of validation.
We live in a noisy, audio-visual world. Words fly at us from all directions.
Is it any surprise we wonder if anyone is listening? How will they hear us over all the noise?
- Write with passion
- Write about what you believe
- Ask how you can help
When you receive a response, it means someone stepped away from the noise and connected with you.
- And isn’t that what the game is all about?
- I’ll take that over 1,000 Likes any day
How do you make your writing heard?
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I’d take being heard once, over 1000 likes too. People who can truly hear have an innate social skill that allows them to consider other people. As opposed to simply considering their own self-absorbed needs or likes. An important skill for personal and professional relationships.
Nicky Parry recently posted..Breast Cancer In Men
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Nicky. Listening was something I really had to work at. My mind would race with ideas that hit my mouth before they should.
I realized how rude it was and worked on developing my listening skills. Either that or my boomer brain has seriously slowed down.
Great post, as usual, Cathy. Hope you like my tweet!
Roy A. Ackerman, Ph.D., E.A. recently posted..Who knows what Evil lurks in the hearts…
Thanks, Roy, for the comment and the creative Tweet – as usual.
That validation need is critical far too often. We do not believe that what we say is useful unless someone validates us but bottom line, we have the ability to make things happen for ourselves and the audience will come just as the teacher comes when you need to learn something
Interesting post and thanks for sharing Cathy
Roberta Budvietas recently posted..Decision Trees and Dead Ends
Thank you, Roberta, for a different perspective. Yes, you are right, we have to respect our own abilities as well as others. By the way, love your avatar.
Listen helps you be heard with great ease Cathy. Listeners are leaders with a loud and clear message many tune in to: I listen, I care. We like hearing this
Thanks for sharing
RB
Ryan Biddulph recently posted..Learn the Quickest and Easiest Way to Become Financially Free
Thanks, Ryan. Glad you like hearing it and are heard.
Really listening, deeply, is an art and a practice. Thanks for the reminder.
Anne Wayman recently posted..8 Ways I Find Good Freelance Writing Jobs On Craigslist
One I have to work on every day, Anne.
Thanks for stopping by.